You know what never ceases to amaze me? No, it wasn’t the traffic stop with the 18-year-old hooker with the love child…although that’s an amusing tale.
No, what never ceases to amaze me is when I’m trying to conduct a traffic stop and suddenly the driver of the vehicle I’m attempting to stop becomes a complete stickler for the rules of the road.
Case in point:
I recently stopped someone for speeding. I pulled out and hit the emergency lights. The vehicle just kept on a-goin’.
What the hell?!?
Upon the eventual contact, I asked the driver why they didn’t stop when they saw the pretty lights and heard the loud ass siren.
Here are three of the dumbest things I’ve heard on a traffic stop as excuses for not stopping:
- The curb was red. Really?!? The noise and strobes behind you don’t trump the red curb? God forbid you use some common sense and think that perhaps I have rear lights to indicate to approaching traffic to take car whilst I crush your soul.
- I didn’t think it was safe. I don’t care what you think is safe. And by the way, I typically don’t turn on my lights until I want you to stop…which is usually right where you are! Also, when you don’t stop, it makes it less and less safe as time goes on. Because I assume you are hiding your kilo of coke and your sawed-off shotgun.
- I was in the left lane, so I thought I’d continue my left turn and pull off the main road. Well, far be it from me to dissuade you from your current course and/or destination…oh, no. Wait. That’s exactly what I’m trying to do!
Good Lord, people.
The vehicle code (at least in the great state of CA…but I imagine other 49 have a similar statute) requires you to “immediately drive to the right-hand edge or curb of the highway, clear of any intersection, and therupon shall stop and remain stopped…” (CVC 21806(a)(1)) when a traffic stop finds you.
Remember that place on your license with your signature? Yeah, that is more or less your acknowledgement that you are aware of and understand the rules of the freaking road.
So, do me a favor Mr/Ms Sudden Stickler of the Law, when you see the flashy-flashies come on behind you, it would behoove you to pull to the right and wait nice and patient-like for me to make contact.
If you just keep on cruising along on your whim, you may just see an extra violation on your inevitable citation.